Or So He Thought
by LunaMystik
Summary: Luke's thoughts as he's forced to attend the event of Episode 5.13, Wedding Bell Blues. Spoiler-ish. Not a one-shot anymore. Re-uploaded in an attempt to fix formatting problems.
1. Before

**This is a fic loosely based on spoilers from Episode 5.13, Wedding Bell Blues. **

**Random thoughts that go through Luke's mind as he watches Emily and Richard renew their vows.**

**Luke's thoughts are in italics.**

**If you wish to remain spoiler free, this fic is not for you.**

For the fifty-third time in the last fifteen minutes, Luke desperately wished he were somewhere else. His shoes were too tight, his tie was choking him and he felt ridiculous sitting by himself in a crowd full of Hartfordites (Hartfordians? Hartfordans? Hartforders? _Whatever_, he thought). He'd been counting on Lorelai's presence to get him through the event unscathed, but she was up front at the altar with her mother. Something about being the maid of honour, he remembered.

_I shouldn't have let her talk me into coming_, he grumbled mentally. Sure, he gets that along with the many, many benefits of dating a Gilmore come many, _many_ responsibilities, but being forced to watch rich, self-indulgent Hartford snobs renew their wedding vows should be where he draws the line.

It's not as if her parents appreciated his presence. The only time he had met either of Lorelai's parents as the boyfriend had been a disaster. Her mother had been so subtly rude that it had been impossible to take offence until the evening had ended and the undercover nastiness had sunk in. Her father had been disapproving and downright scary in his attempts to take over all aspects of his life. Both events had culminated in Luke swearing to himself that, unless Lorelai pouted, did the hair twirl, wheedled and promised an appearance in her little black dress, he would have nothing to do with the elder Gilmores. Luckily, Lorelai was far from close to them. Or at least, she said she was. Luke was willing to bet his blue cap that the smile on her face as she stood with her parents at the front of the room was a lot more real than she would like to admit.

Regardless, a renewal of wedding vows was an occasion that demanded her presence, and unless he wanted to be ostracized (_Jeez, I'm so bored that I'm using big words. Bring me a crossword puzzle, I'm a step away from counting the ceiling tiles_) from the family forever and forced to endure both Lorelai and Rory begging with him to come, he knew he had better put on his only suit and make with the fake smiles.

_What is it about rich people that they feel the need to renew their vows?_ He was sure it was just another mystery of the upper class he was destined to never solve. He didn't get it. He was admittedly a very private guy who still cringed at the memory of the tackiness of marrying a woman he didn't love on a cruise ship, but _still_. Any excuse to throw an elaborate party, he guessed.

If ever he did get married again, he would insist on a simple affair where he could wear whatever he liked and have the reception at the diner. _Yeah, somehow I can't picture Lorelai going along with that idea…_

Luke vigorously shook his head, drawing the attention of the people seated to his right. _Where did that come from?_ Sure, he cared about Lorelai, probably more than about any other woman, but his divorce wasn't even a year old yet and, if he was honest with himself, he wasn't sure how committed she was to the relationship.

Luke winced, took a deep breath to try to pull himself together and made an effort to push the thought out of his mind. He didn't want to think about the off-ness of Lorelai's attitude in the last couple of weeks. In most ways, her knew her as well as he knew himself, but there were still some instances where she was a total mystery to him. He could always tell when she was being deliberately evasive or outright untruthful, but he couldn't figure out what was bothering her this time and lacked the guts to come out and ask her. _Too afraid of what I'll find out, I guess_, he thought.

He let his gaze wander around the room, taking in the workmanship in the mouldings and the elaborate clock on the wall. He absently noticed that he hadn't been paying attention to anything the judge who was performing the ceremony had said in the past five minutes. He toyed with the idea of faking an elaborate yawn, complete with obscenely obvious arm movements, just to see how many stern glances he could attract his way. His lips curved into a smirk as he imagined Emily's horrified expression. He glanced at the back of her head and considered glaring at her until she felt the weight of this stare and was forced to turn around. _Yeah, real mature. What am I, five?_

He shook himself slightly to clear his mind of his childish thoughts and glanced to the left of Emily, where Lorelai stood. _God, she looks amazing._ She was mesmerizing, even from the back. Even from halfway across the room, he could tell that she was wearing a thong under her clingy dress. He felt his mind go blank and the heat set in as he imagined what he hoped would happen after this god-awful ceremony was over. He was a little fuzzy on the details for the moment, what with the blood slowly draining out of this head, but he was hoping it would involve him slowly sliding his hands up her thighs and lightly grazing her butt before ripping the dress off and plunging hot into her.

His thoughts were quickly escalating to indecent levels when a movement out of the corner of this eye distracted him and brought him crashing back down to Earth. He focused and noticed the man in front of him shifting suspiciously in his seat. He followed the direction of his gaze and noticed that it was focused on…Lorelai. _Ah, jeez!_

Enough with the dirty thoughts about his girlfriend, they were apparently contagious. _Could this stupid ceremony be any longer? This isn't an actual wedding!_ He wondered if anyone would notice if he nodded off right then and there. He could just close his eyes, take deep breaths and use the monotonous tone of the judge to lull himself off to sleep. Or, better yet, he could fake a coughing fit and leave the room so as not to bother anyone. _How considerate…_It was fortunate that he chose that exact moment to look back towards the front of the room; Lorelai had turned around and was looking at him with a half-smile on her face and a knowing look in her eyes. _I'm sure she knows what's going through my mind…I wonder if she knew what was going on in it about 30 seconds ago_?

He returned her smile and not-so-subtly raked his eyes up and down her body. She knew what he was doing and a change came over her…her smile became more intimate, her pose more seductive. The heat rose again, because he knew that it was just for him; this time he didn't care if anyone else was staring. _Let them look, for all I care. Tonight she's going home with me._

Or so he thought.


	2. After

A/N (1) I wasn't going to continue this fic, but I'm stuck writing a case study for my advertising class and this is SOOO much more fun.

A/N (2) Thanks to those who reviewed the first chapter, it means a lot to me to realize that people actually do read my crazy ideas. This chapter is dedicated to netherfield and gilmoregirl1979 (there's a special small scene in there just for you, guess which!), two of my favorite fic writers. Keep 'em coming girls!

A/N (3) This picks up right after Luke left the wedding reception after Christopher (bastard!) opens his big mouth and ruins everything.

_What the hell was that?_ Luke wondered as he stormed out of the reception hall. _Who does that moron think he is?_ Luke paused to catch his breath and realized that he couldn't leave as he had planned to do. He had driven up with Lorelai and Rory in the Jeep. He had the keys in this pocket, and he was tempted for just a moment to take off but, mad as he was at her right now, there was no way he was leaving her stranded here. It would probably obliterate all leverage he had right now. He was the wounded party, and he planned to keep it that way.

_What now?_ He couldn't go back in there. There was no way he could face either Christopher or Emily at this point. The latter he was afraid he'd rant into oblivion, the former he wanted to punch in the gut, neither of which behaviors would be welcome at the reception, of that he was sure.

And there was no way he could even look at Lorelai right now. He didn't think he'd ever been this mad at anyone in his life. For her to lie to him about seeing Christopher, then to own up to it only when faced with the possibility of being uncovered (_What the hell was with that? Like he wouldn't have understood? Was he that unreasonable?_), and then to just stand there while Christopher spouted his lunacy about Lorelai and him being meant to be together and saying that Emily agreed with it…to be honest, he had been so consumed with rage at the words coming out of Christopher's mouth that he couldn't exactly recall what Lorelai was doing, but he was sure he'd have noticed if she'd come out and said "I'm with Luke and I want to be with him, not YOU!"

He sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. This was getting him nowhere. His most pressing concern was finding a way out of Hartford and back to Star's Hollow. He didn't want to find Lorelai to give her the keys back, 'cause she'd probably beg him to stay or promise to leave with him, and he didn't want to deal with either possibility feeling the way he did now.

He heard footsteps approaching and a familiar voice saying, "Just take me back to Yale."

_Rory!_ Of course! She'd give the keys back to Lorelai with a minimum of questions. Luke turned and waited for her to walk by him before reaching out to grab her arm.

She jumped at that, gave a little scream and let out her breath in relief when she saw that it was him. "Hey Luke, what're you doing out here?"

"Listen Rory, I don't want to get into it now. Could you just take these keys back to your mom?" Luke handed her the keys to the Jeep, stuffed his hands in his coat pockets and turned to walk away.

"Wait!" _Damn, so close._ He turned around at the concerned tone in her voice and noticed for the first time whom Rory was with; it was that blond kid that had inadvertedly started the fight with Christopher which had led to his current situation._ I really don't want to deal with this now._

"Everything's ok Rory, just take them back to Lorelai and tell her I'll call her later," he said, giving her a small smile to show her that everything was indeed fine.

But Rory wasn't buying it. "What happened? Was it Dad? What did he do? I can't believe it, I told him to stay away from Mom, he always ruins everything for her! I'll go find him – "

"Rory, it's nothing, I swear. I'll see you next weekend." Luke turned on his heels and walked away as quickly as his uncomfortable shoes would allow. He liked Rory, he really did, but when he looked at her right now, all he could see was Lorelai's blue eyes staring back at him and he needed to get away from it all.

He spotted a bus stop across the street and made his way over to it, hoping it was for the bus that would take him back to Star's Hollow, his diner and his life, or whatever was left of it.

Luke breathed a sigh of relief as he unlocked the door to his apartment. Never had a bus ride seemed so interminable to him. He had nothing to read, so he had been stuck there with nothing to do but avoid his own thoughts and watch the scenery roll by.

He quickly toed off his dress shoes and threw his coat on the rack by the door. He all but ripped off his jacket, wound up and launched it in the general direction of the bed. He wanted all reminders of the day gone. His tie was next, followed quickly by his shirt. His gaze landed on his blue shirt, _her_ blue shirt, and the anger welled up fresh within him again. He attacked his belt and ripped off his dress pants, wanting nothing more than to slip into a clean pair of jeans and an old flannel shirt. Comfort clothes, familiarity, home; that's all he wanted right now. Never mind that home had become dangerously entwined with Lorelai in the last couple of months, he wanted his stuff and his routine, back before she turned his life upside down by telling him to stand still.

He stalked to his closet but only made it as far as the bed, upon which he sank down and placed his elbows on his knees, his head in his hands; a grown man sitting on his unmade bed in nothing but his boxers in the late afternoon light, finally ready to contemplate the mess that a beautiful woman had made of his life.


End file.
